• The Triple Play (B)

    From Daryl Stout@316:36/20 to All on Thu Apr 13 00:03:56 2023
    The Ham Radio Wedding - Uniting Ham And Radio In Holy Telephony

    With "pun" in mind, we are privileged to welcome you to the marriage
    ceremony of "ham" and "radio". After a short engagement...because
    concerning Radio, Ham could not resistor...wanting to inductor into
    being a part of his family, and start a new one. So, they've decided to
    do more than just "shack up".

    Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today for this special net for the
    joyous occasion to join ham and radio in Holy Telephony. Ham has just
    passed his amateur radio license exams, so he will be Third Party Traffic,
    as he waits on his callsign from the FCC.

    The general format of this RF, or Real Fine, ceremony, will be
    participatory in nature...and for the bride and groom, it is a big
    deal...and the atmosphere is rather electric, to say the least.

    If anyone here feels that ham and radio should not be united in Marriage
    of HolyTelephony, let them key up now, or never pound their brass.

    However, you likely will be subjected to the wrath of the Wouff Hong, Rettysnitch, and Ugerumph by both families if you object (hi hi).

    Does the father of the bride, KenWood, give his consent for this special occasion??

    [Sound of "YES, I do", 20 wpm CW]

    Do you ham, take radio, to be your lawfully wedded spouse?? To love,
    honor, and cherish?? In DXCC and WAS?? In QRM and QRN?? With Rohn 25 and
    G5RV?? With coaxial cable and various connectors?? With logbooks and
    manuals?? With Solder and Testing Equipment??

    Respecting The Wouff Hong, Rettysnitch, and Ugerumph, Your License, and Privileges. Forsaking all others, as long as you both shall transmit and receive, during your relationship, until Silent Key, do you part??

    [Sound of male voice "QSL. I Certainly Do."(Tim Cornett)]

    Do you radio, take ham, to be your lawfully wedded spouse?? To love,
    honor, and cherish?? In DXCC and WAS?? In QRM and QRN?? With Rohn 25 and
    G5RV?? With coaxial cable and various connectors?? With logbooks and
    manuals?? With Solder and Testing Equipment??

    Respecting The Wouff Hong, Rettysnitch, and Ugerumph, Your License, and Privileges. Forsaking all others, as long as you both shall transmit and receive, during your relationship, until Silent Key, do you part??

    [Sound of PSK31]

    In lieu of a prayer and Bible reading, I feel that The Amateur's Code,
    written in 1928, by the late Paul M. Segal, W9EEA, is appropriate for
    this ceremony. As such, I would expect that both of you, "ham" and
    "radio", would follow these traits, as you both transmit and receive
    throughout your relationship. You are to be:

    CONSIDERATE: Never knowingly operating in such a way as to lessen the
    pleasure of others.

    LOYAL: Offering loyalty, encouragement and support to other amateurs,
    local clubs, and the American Radio Relay League, through which Amateur
    Radio in the United States is represented nationally, and internationally.

    PROGRESSIVE: With knowledge abreast of science, a well built and efficient station, and operation beyond reproach.

    FRIENDLY: With slow and patient operation when requested, friendly advice
    and counsel to the beginner, kindly assistance, co-operation and
    consideration for the interests of others. These are the hallmarks of the amateur spirit.

    BALANCED: Radio is an avocation, never interfering with duties owed to
    family, job, school, or community.

    PATRIOTIC: With station and skill always ready for service to country and community.

    Please stand by while I get the special marriage connectors.

    With these specially prepared BNC, SMA, and PL259 connectors, along with
    LED lights...each of you are to present them to each other, and either
    say or transmit "With This Connector, I thee, LED".

    These special combination connectors and LED's...light emitting diodes...
    will show that you will light up with excitement each time you transmit throughout your relationship.

    [Sound of male voice "WithThis Connector, IThee, LED"]. (Tim Cornett)

    [Sound Of RTTY]

    In as much as you two have promised your devotion, and lifelong commitment
    to each other; before Net Control, and all these witnesses on the net...by
    the power that has been invested in me, by the Cabot Nightflyers Net, as
    Net Control and Webmaster, I now pronounce you "ham" and "radio".

    You may now kiss the mic.

    [Sound of packet burst]

    [MaleVoice "My bride just told me to packet. The honeymoon will be at
    Dayton Hamvention in May...and we will have music of The Ham Band at the reception."] (Tim Cornett)

    At net time, few details were available on the reception, but we assume
    it was excellent. As for the food that was served, we understand everyone
    got a charge out of an electrically delicious salad concoction that was prepared...known as Ohm Slaw. And, let's definitely not forget the
    delightfully D-Layer rich dessert of P Times I Equals E.

    We have no word on the wedding cake that was served...the removal of the garter...the bridal bouquet...what everyone was wearing...how many guests
    were in attendance, who got the garter and bouquet, etc.

    However, we understand the wedding gifts consisted of several nice
    electronic, and ornamental, items and accessories for the ham radio
    shack, among other things...which were much appreciated by the bride and
    groom.
    --- SBBSecho 3.14-Win32
    * Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - Little Rock, Arkansas (316:36/20)